January

T.S. Eliot said "April is the cruelest month" but he obviously didn't live in Alaska.  I learned long ago that one should never make big decisions in January in Fairbanks, when the cold and dark have hold and the temporary high of the holiday season dips lower than the temperature.  There' s not much to look forward to in January.  February could be even colder, March is a coin toss, April just teases that May will come.

I know myself enough to know that I have to stay positive or I'l spiral down into the doldrums.  It's hard some times because the people around me, people that I work with and live with and love and like, are fighting the same fight I am.

At work, January is when the school district releases the budget predictions and this year's shortfall is more extreme than last year.  The reality of this is that Bob enters a season of meetings and fighting for monies that were provided for special education.  It means that I worry that my position will be cut, or that I'll lose a colleague who keeps me sane and loving my work.  It means that the public and teaches will engage public and sometimes vitriolic debate instead of rallying and supporting our students.

So I thumb my nose and January, determined to smile my way through.

"January is here, with eyes that keenly glow,
A frost-mailed warrior
striding a shadowy steed of snow."
            ~Edgar Fawcett