belief
"All I have seen teaches me to trust the Creator for all I have not seen. "~Ralph Waldo Emerson
My son asks a lot of questions. This is a good thing. But lately, there's been some dissonance in our household when it comes to answering questions about faith and belief.
The basic breakdown is that my husband is a behaviorist, a scientist at heart who believes in systems and ideas that can be proven. He wants tangible evidence of existence. I, on the other hand, believe in stuff that can't be proven. I like evidence, and I like rational explanations, but I firmly believe that not everything in life can be explained within our current scientific methods or systems. I also value a good story or moral over truth, which is relative in my humble opinion.
These differences manifest when my son asks questions about gods, ghosts, and legends. For example, we're currently reading the Percy Jackson and the Olympians series, which combines the adventures and angst of a 7th grader with the Greek myths and monsters. Although I don't necessarily believe that Zeus and Poseidon are still affecting the modern world, I don't have a problem with Jed believing in that possibility. In one sense myths are simply stories that explain the ways the world functions; gods do that and so does science, which changes over time I think it's okay for Jed to look at different explanations for life's mysteries. My husband's view is that it's important to study the gods and myths, but it's also important to clarify that they're not true, they're "just stories."
Another big area of difference is ghosts. Now I'm perfectly aware that lots of folks (including my husband) may think I'm silly, but I've had 3 distinct experiences with ghosts and I believe in them. Granted, they're not the white sheet, spooky noises ghosts, but they're manifestations that can be felt or seen but not explained "rationally." So when my son asks if I believe in ghosts, I have to answer "yes" if I'm to be truthful. When my son asks my husband who answers "there are no such things as ghosts," there's a bit of a problem. My son wonders aloud who is right, mama or papa? Obviously both can't be right, right?
Belief in a christian God is another area of controversy right now. Jed has somehow decided that God is a benevolent santa-like creature to whom he can pray when he wants a specific item or to get out of chores. He believes that he's up in the sky and can see everything. Bob and I both struggle with organized religion, but are very spiritual, so the answers to Jed's questions are less clear cut. We tend to "see" God in the world very differently. Jed wants some yes or no answers that we can't give him, and we often can't even agree on terminology or ideas for the murky answers either.
Overall, I don't think it will screw up our kids too much to have more questions than answers and to realize that some questions may not even have answers. Our kids know that Bob and I love and respect and like each other, so it may even be good for them to see that we can agree to disagree.
As for me, I like clinging to my ideas about how the world works. I am perfectly comfortable reconciling my beliefs in both pre-destination and free will. I love the concept that true love exists, that eyes can meet across a crowded room while the clouds part and a beam of sunshine illuminates perfect soul mates. I'm comfortable believing in a God who created the universe and the proof of evolution through scientific methods.
Over and over I come back to Emerson and the Transcendentalists. Trust your instincts, appreciate the world, ask the questions.
"We live in succession, in division, in parts, in particles. Meantime within man is the soul of the whole; the wise silence; the universal beauty, to which every part and particle is equally related, the eternal ONE. And this deep power in which we exist and whose beatitude is all accessible to us, is not only self-sufficing and perfect in every hour, but the act of seeing and the thing seen, the seer and the spectacle, the subject and the object, are one. We see the world piece by piece, as the sun, the moon, the animal, the tree; but the whole, of which these are shining parts, is the soul." - The Over-Soul, from Essays: First Series, Ralph Waldo Emerson, 1841
My son asks a lot of questions. This is a good thing. But lately, there's been some dissonance in our household when it comes to answering questions about faith and belief.
The basic breakdown is that my husband is a behaviorist, a scientist at heart who believes in systems and ideas that can be proven. He wants tangible evidence of existence. I, on the other hand, believe in stuff that can't be proven. I like evidence, and I like rational explanations, but I firmly believe that not everything in life can be explained within our current scientific methods or systems. I also value a good story or moral over truth, which is relative in my humble opinion.
These differences manifest when my son asks questions about gods, ghosts, and legends. For example, we're currently reading the Percy Jackson and the Olympians series, which combines the adventures and angst of a 7th grader with the Greek myths and monsters. Although I don't necessarily believe that Zeus and Poseidon are still affecting the modern world, I don't have a problem with Jed believing in that possibility. In one sense myths are simply stories that explain the ways the world functions; gods do that and so does science, which changes over time I think it's okay for Jed to look at different explanations for life's mysteries. My husband's view is that it's important to study the gods and myths, but it's also important to clarify that they're not true, they're "just stories."
Another big area of difference is ghosts. Now I'm perfectly aware that lots of folks (including my husband) may think I'm silly, but I've had 3 distinct experiences with ghosts and I believe in them. Granted, they're not the white sheet, spooky noises ghosts, but they're manifestations that can be felt or seen but not explained "rationally." So when my son asks if I believe in ghosts, I have to answer "yes" if I'm to be truthful. When my son asks my husband who answers "there are no such things as ghosts," there's a bit of a problem. My son wonders aloud who is right, mama or papa? Obviously both can't be right, right?
Belief in a christian God is another area of controversy right now. Jed has somehow decided that God is a benevolent santa-like creature to whom he can pray when he wants a specific item or to get out of chores. He believes that he's up in the sky and can see everything. Bob and I both struggle with organized religion, but are very spiritual, so the answers to Jed's questions are less clear cut. We tend to "see" God in the world very differently. Jed wants some yes or no answers that we can't give him, and we often can't even agree on terminology or ideas for the murky answers either.
Overall, I don't think it will screw up our kids too much to have more questions than answers and to realize that some questions may not even have answers. Our kids know that Bob and I love and respect and like each other, so it may even be good for them to see that we can agree to disagree.
As for me, I like clinging to my ideas about how the world works. I am perfectly comfortable reconciling my beliefs in both pre-destination and free will. I love the concept that true love exists, that eyes can meet across a crowded room while the clouds part and a beam of sunshine illuminates perfect soul mates. I'm comfortable believing in a God who created the universe and the proof of evolution through scientific methods.
Over and over I come back to Emerson and the Transcendentalists. Trust your instincts, appreciate the world, ask the questions.
"We live in succession, in division, in parts, in particles. Meantime within man is the soul of the whole; the wise silence; the universal beauty, to which every part and particle is equally related, the eternal ONE. And this deep power in which we exist and whose beatitude is all accessible to us, is not only self-sufficing and perfect in every hour, but the act of seeing and the thing seen, the seer and the spectacle, the subject and the object, are one. We see the world piece by piece, as the sun, the moon, the animal, the tree; but the whole, of which these are shining parts, is the soul." - The Over-Soul, from Essays: First Series, Ralph Waldo Emerson, 1841
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