Northern Noise

So today Jed's supposed to clean his room. He's actually been in there about 6 hours, since his father said he can't come out until it's done. As far as I can tell, nothing has been put away in that time, although perhaps some more items have come out of the toy tub during the endeavor. I got up a moment ago to check on the progress. "What do you think mom? Looking good?" I took a long look around the room, saw the covers on the floor, the tubs overflowing with random items, the dirty clothes bin sitting on its side with shirt falling out, the Lego creations he's made today, and answered "hmmm, maybe not so good." Jed got up off his bed and walked over to me. "Tell you what mom, how about I give you three big ones and you look the other way?" Jed reaches into the jar on his dresser and pulls out three, crumpled one dollar bills. I must have looked amused because he went on. "Seriously mom, it could be yours." I explained...

My son thinks he doesn't need to go to second grade. He knows everything, he tells me. If he stayed home he could take care of the dogs. If I stayed home with him we could just snuggle all day. I'm a mean mom and make him go to school anyway. Every day I pick him up I do the hard sell on how great going to school is. Yesterday, I did my usual asking of open ended questions (trying to force him beyond the grunts of "uh-huh" or "nothing" that yes or no questions elicit) and we had this conversation. Jed: "My teacher is really quite horrible mom. Seriously." Mama: "How so? Give me an example of what she does that's so horrible." Jed: "We're not allowed to tell you. We're supposed to keep it secret." Mama: "Why Jed, that's not good. You better tell me!" Jed: "Okay, mom, I'll tell you. She hits us. And she hits us with something." Mama: "She hits you with something?! That...

Fall has come to Fairbanks. It's sunny outside right now, and relatively warm, but the air is different, sharper somehow. I love fall. One reason it's the start of a new year for those of us whose lives revolve around education for our jobs and kids. Fall means new clothes, new opportunities, new friends, new adventures. It's the start of routines, that make life feel more comfortable, predictable and safe. I love fall because it's the perfect weather for me. Too cool for bugs, yet warm enough to get outside. Camping in the falltime is one of my favorite things to do. I love to wake up and slowly peek out from my sleeping bag, letting the cool air become my breath and feeling my nose get chilly. The morning's cold enough to require a nice mug of coffee, yet I don't have to bundle up too much with heavy coats and gear. By lunchtime the air is warm, short sleeves emerge, and I can play outside all day without suffering from heat exhaustion or having to su...

Here's my advice for today: There are two possessions one should never count - shoes or books. You see my friend, counting these items creates a impossible situation. No matter what number you come up with, it doesn't seem like enough to the owner. And no matter what number you come up with, friends and family will express astonishment and think you're excessive. The reality is that one can never own too many shoes, or too many books. Shoes turn the mundane work day into something fun and exciting. Having the right shoes for an occasion not only helps to smooth social interactions, but it marks a person as professional and caring about his/her appearance. Plus, shoes are just cool. As for books, if one has a book, one is never alone. Books allow the reader to travel the world and examine life's conflicts and passions without having to enter into dangerous situations. Books inspire thinking and examination of issues. Think of Ralph Waldo Emerson's quote ...

I think one of the world's greatest inventions is the blueberry lemon drop. A variation of the traditional lemon drop from the genus vodka and species martini, a blueberry martini utilizes blueberry flavored vodka in lieu of plain vodka. The subtle blueberry essence, when married with the sweet yet sour lemon drop base makes for a taste sensation. In other words, they're just damn good. Another reason I enjoy the luscious blueberry lemon drop is that it reminds me of my sister. No, she's not a hopeless drinker (although maybe a hopeless stinker! ha ha!) it's that we shared a delightful evening at her home this summer sharing this particular cocktail. So drinking a freshly shaken, not stirred, martini makes me think of her. Lastly, it's Friday night after a long week. The kids started school on Wednesday, and even though they enjoy being back at school, it's been a bit stressful getting us all back on a routine. So it was nice to come home, throw open the ...

The first day of school is tomorrow. Ali will be a sophomore in high school; tenth grade is a big year. She's got her outfit all picked out though she's still undecided about how to wear her hair. She's checked with her friends via Facebook and texting to find out who's in her classes with her. Watch out Lathrop High School, here she comes! Jed will be in second grade. He's in a 2nd / 3rd multi-age class this year, which he's not thrilled about although he says he's willing to give it a try. He knows some kids in his class, and although his best friend Henri isn't in his class his teacher promises they can see each other at lunch and recess. First the first time in a long time I'm not uptight about the first day of school. Last year I spent the night before having a breakdown, and I had decided halfway through the first day that I wouldn't be teaching. Prior to that I'd always been super excited and happy about the first day of school,...

Della is our puppy. Jed got her for Christmas and when we brought her home she was exactly 6 weeks old and fit in Bob's cupped hands. As opposed to our other big dogs, she needed to stay inside and had to sleep with one of us because she got scared and cried. Now, at 9 months old, Della thinks she's an equal member of the family, and is pretty much treated as such. She sleeps on the couch, or a bed, comes in and out constantly, and chews on Jed as she would with another puppy. This has been a big step at our house, although I hesitate to mention it because Bob will deny it. See, Bob grew up on a farm where dogs - all animals - stayed outside. Dogs had fleas and were simply not on a par with humans. I grew up where I might get chastised from my mother for trying to move a dog off the couch so I could sit down. The dog was there first. So much our our union has been spent debating the role of dogs in our family and boundaries we set for them. Bob has finally seen the ligh...

On Monday I started back to work. That meant a couple of things. One was to get out the teacher clothes and put away the summer clothes, and the lounge around the house clothes of last winter. Another was to start getting up early. I'm getting used to that, but still not getting to bed early enough, which isn't a good combination. Since it's a new job, I 'm practicing keeping my eyes open and my mouth shut. This isn't always the easiest course for me, but so far so good. It was a pretty good week. I have missed the world of education, talking shop so to speak. Just talking about how to teach, and idea for units was awesome. I hadn't realized that I had been so nervous about the transition from teacher at one school to a coaching position. Folks were great though, and I felt like there wasn't a big change in relationships with my move downtown. I also hadn't realized that I was afraid. I was afraid that I had forgotten how to teach in the year I t...

Yesterday as we were walking across the parking lot, Jed looked down and said to me, "Mom, don't step on the line or you're break your father's spine." Mama: "But Jed, my dad is already dead." Jed: "Yeah, but mom, his skeleton probably has a spine, doesn't it?" Mama: "Actually, Grampa Woody was cremated, remember? He doesn't really have a skeleton any more." Jed: "Good point mom. I guess his spine is already broken. (he continues to think for a moment.....) Okay. I suppose you can step on all the lines you want."

Today, driving home from North Pole, I got myself a nice cup of fancy coffee and got Jedidiah a cup of hot chocolate. He took a sip and said, "Man, this hot chocolate is delicious." Suddenly I felt myself a bit overcome; I was so happy to hear him enjoying that cocoa. See, when Jed was about 6 months old we found out that he was allergic to food. Not all food, mind you, he could eat blueberries, rice and sweet potatoes. We took the poor baby in because he was losing weight, was having stomach issues, and had developed a bumpy rash all over his body that made him look like a skinny, plucked chicken. Figuring out that he had multiple food allergies was helpful, in that we knew the cause for his sickness, but it didn't help us figure out foods this kid could eat without getting sick. I had to stop breastfeeding, since everything I ate was making him sick. We did find a baby formula consisting of synthetic proteins that he could digest, which meant he was getting nutritio...

Today I googled the following question: Do slugs eat meat? Although some might think this a crazy question, the reality is that there are slugs living at my mom's house that only emerge when red meat is cooked on the barbecue grill. Since, according to the Colorado extension service, slugs avoid heat and dry conditions, this penchant for ribs seems an odd occurance. It turns out though, that some slugs do eat meat, although it's usually cat food-type meat as opposed to beef. There's a great summary of slug biology and behavior at the following link: http://www.ext.colostate.edu/pubs/insect/05515.html Who knew slugs were so interesting? Or disgusting? Or potentially destructive? I found a great video on Youtube of "the largest slug in the world." Pretty cool stuff: I'm glad I live here in the dry interior of Alaska, where carnivorous slugs, and herbivorous slugs as well, are few and far between.

She moved to the beach to start over. After years behind a desk, processing paperwork for deadbeats, she was looking to forward some quiet. Her monthly pension from the state, combined with social security and the money her father had left her provided enough income for the full cable package on television, her book of the month club, and necessities. She didn't subscribe to the newspaper any more; nothing in there but bad news. All her working life had been dealing with deadbeats, people making excuses for why they weren't working, why they didn't take care of their children, their bills, or themselves. The newspaper was just a reminder of that. The first slug appeared late in the evening. She'd just finished watching America's Got Talent and went to check the doors and windows before heading to bed for the night. When she turned on the porch light, she saw a huge shadow on the screen door. About 4 inches long, it had worked the front half of ...