yin and yang
So a new threshold has been crossed in the world of Hadaways. Last night, Jed had his first sleepover. For some crazy reason, his teacher and the other 2nd/3rd grade multiage class have a sleepover at the school at the end of the year. Jed had initially said he wasn't going to go, but changed his mind the morning of. So after school yesterday, he looked carefully at the packing list, prepared and packed his duffel bag, and waited for his father to get home and take him.
To say he was a little wound up with excitement is a true understatement. I actually worried one of his sisters would kill him before he was able to depart. Finally, I sent him out on to the porch to watch for his papa. He started on the porch, and soon had his duffle bag in the yard while he ran up the porch and down the driveway watching for Bob's truck.
I sat inside, listening to him talk to the dogs until eventually, I heard the pickup in the driveway. Then, suddenly, I heard doors open, doors shut, and the truck drive away. My son had left for his first sleepover without even kissing his mama good bye!!
I tried to be rational. He was excited, he is 8, it's understandable, right? Still, I felt a big sadness descend upon me. When Bob got home he walked in and said, "I didn't like dropping him off knowing he wouldn't be home until tomorrow."
What ensued was interesting. The girls were out in the studio, and for the first time since Jed was born Bob and I were alone in the house. All by ourselves for an entire evening. We could have gone crazy! Instead, dampered by my cold and the absence of children, we sat and moped and talked about the kids. Both of us were amazed at how much Jed being gone affected us. Bob had at least gotten a kiss goodbye, but he claimed that actually having to drop him off was worse than just watching him go.
We survived the night. And this morning, Jed came home, girls came inside and all was back to normal. Jed was grouchy so he antagonized his sisters and the dog. The girls lingered over breakfast postponing a day of raking leaves and old dog poop.
This afternoon, however, mama got hers. Bob went to town, girls to town, leaving boy and I here alone on a beautiful sunny day. Jed made himself some lunch as was talking to me when all of a sudden he got up and walked over and climbed into my lap. He swallowed the last of his sandwich and said, "I'm tired mama." Then he put his head on my chest, wrapped his arms around one of mine, and fell fast asleep.
It's been awhile since a child fell asleep in my lap. I'd forgotten the sound of his breathing, how I could hear it change as he crossed into sleep. As he relaxed, he body twitched and jumped until at last he let out a big sigh and was still. I'd forgotten how his hand clenches into a fist when he falls asleep, like he's literally fighting to stay awake. I spent two blissful hours with Jed asleep on my chest. I got to kiss the top of his head as much as I wanted without him pulling away. I got to snuggle him and hold him and remember that he loves his mama.
Being old enough to go spend the night is a big step, and I'm grateful for an afternoon of my boy napping in my lap. I don't know if I'll get this chance again; he is getting bigger and at some point he won't be climbing into my lap anymore. But today was just the balance I needed to cope with last night. Heaven.
To say he was a little wound up with excitement is a true understatement. I actually worried one of his sisters would kill him before he was able to depart. Finally, I sent him out on to the porch to watch for his papa. He started on the porch, and soon had his duffle bag in the yard while he ran up the porch and down the driveway watching for Bob's truck.
I sat inside, listening to him talk to the dogs until eventually, I heard the pickup in the driveway. Then, suddenly, I heard doors open, doors shut, and the truck drive away. My son had left for his first sleepover without even kissing his mama good bye!!
I tried to be rational. He was excited, he is 8, it's understandable, right? Still, I felt a big sadness descend upon me. When Bob got home he walked in and said, "I didn't like dropping him off knowing he wouldn't be home until tomorrow."
What ensued was interesting. The girls were out in the studio, and for the first time since Jed was born Bob and I were alone in the house. All by ourselves for an entire evening. We could have gone crazy! Instead, dampered by my cold and the absence of children, we sat and moped and talked about the kids. Both of us were amazed at how much Jed being gone affected us. Bob had at least gotten a kiss goodbye, but he claimed that actually having to drop him off was worse than just watching him go.
We survived the night. And this morning, Jed came home, girls came inside and all was back to normal. Jed was grouchy so he antagonized his sisters and the dog. The girls lingered over breakfast postponing a day of raking leaves and old dog poop.
This afternoon, however, mama got hers. Bob went to town, girls to town, leaving boy and I here alone on a beautiful sunny day. Jed made himself some lunch as was talking to me when all of a sudden he got up and walked over and climbed into my lap. He swallowed the last of his sandwich and said, "I'm tired mama." Then he put his head on my chest, wrapped his arms around one of mine, and fell fast asleep.
It's been awhile since a child fell asleep in my lap. I'd forgotten the sound of his breathing, how I could hear it change as he crossed into sleep. As he relaxed, he body twitched and jumped until at last he let out a big sigh and was still. I'd forgotten how his hand clenches into a fist when he falls asleep, like he's literally fighting to stay awake. I spent two blissful hours with Jed asleep on my chest. I got to kiss the top of his head as much as I wanted without him pulling away. I got to snuggle him and hold him and remember that he loves his mama.
Being old enough to go spend the night is a big step, and I'm grateful for an afternoon of my boy napping in my lap. I don't know if I'll get this chance again; he is getting bigger and at some point he won't be climbing into my lap anymore. But today was just the balance I needed to cope with last night. Heaven.
Comments
This is just too sweet! I hope you are feeling better!!